A letter from Jerome (394)

Translated letter:

To Furia, on the duty of remaining a widow.

1. In your letter you beg and beseech me to write— or rather to write by return—and tell you how you ought to live, keeping the crown of widowhood in unsullied chastity. My heart rejoices, my bowels exult, my every fibre thrills to know that you desire to be after marriage what your mother Titiana of saintly memory was for many a year in marriage. Her prayers and entreaties have been heard.  In her only daughter she has been granted that which she herself possessed in her lifetime. Moreover, it is the peculiar glory of your family that from the days of Camillus few or none of your women are recorded as having known a second husband's bed. Therefore you will not be so much deserving of praise if you persist in widowhood, as you would be worthy  of execration if you, a Christian, failed to keep a custom which heathen women observed for so many generations.

2.  I say nothing of Paula and Eustochium, those fair flowers of your stock, lest I should use the opportunity of exhorting you to praise them. I pass over Blesilla also, who following your brother her husband to the grave fulfilled in her life's brief span many years of virtue. I only wish that men would follow the example that women have publicly given them, and that wrinkled age would render that which youth offers of its own free will. I am thrusting my hand into the fire knowingly and with my eyes open. Brows will be knitted, fists shaken against me and with swelling voice will angry Chremes rage [Horace, Ars Poetica, 94] Our great men rise from their chairs, and in answer to this letter of mine the patrician mob will thunder out: 'Magician, seducer; transport him to the ends of the earth.' If they like, they may call me ' Samaritan ' as well; for then I shall recognize a name that was given to my Lord. Assuredly I do not separate the daughter from her mother nor do I use the words of the Gospel: ' Let the dead bury their dead.' For he is alive who believes in Christ, and he who believes in Him ought in any case ' himself also so to walk even as He walked.' 

3.A truce to the envious attack which the tooth of calumny is always making upon the name of Christian, hoping to dissuade men from virtue by fear of abuse. Except by letter we know nothing of one another, and where there is no knowledge in the flesh the only motive for friendship is one of piety. ' Honour thy father,'  but only if he does not separate you from your true Father. Acknowledge the tie of blood, but only so long as he recognizes his Creator. Otherwise David at once will sing to you: ' Hearken, O daughter, and consider, and incline thine ear; forget also thine own people and thy father's house. So shall the king greatly desire thy beauty for he is thy Lord.'  Great is the reward for forgetting a parent: 'the king shall desire thy beauty.' Because you have heard, considered, inclined your ear, and forgotten your people and your father's house,' the king will desire your beauty ' and will say to you : ' Thou I art all fair, my love; there is no spot in thee.'  What can be fairer than a soul which is called daughter of God and seeks no outward adorning? She believes in Christ and enriched by this ambition she goes to her Spouse, having her Lord for Bridegroom. 

4. The trials of marriage you have learned in the married state: you have been surfeited to nausea as though with the flesh of quails. Your mouth has tasted the bitterest of gall, you have voided the sour unwholesome food, you have relieved a heaving stomach. Why would you put into it again something which has already proved harmful to you ? 'The dog is turned to his own vomit again and the sow that was washed to her wallowing in the mire.' Even brute beasts and roving birds do not fall into the same snares or nets twice. Are you afraid that the line of Camillus will cease to exist and that your father will not have a brat of yours to crawl upon his breast and soil his neck with nastiness? Well, do all those who marry have children, and when children are born do they always answer to their family's fame ? Did Cicero's son show his father's eloquence ? Had your own Cornelia, pattern alike of chastity and fruitfulness, cause to rejoice in being mother of the Gracchi? It is absurd to expect as certain the children, which you see many fail to obtain, and many lose after they have got them.  To whom are you going to leave your great wealth?  To Christ who cannot die.  Whom shall you make your heir?  The same who is already your Lord.  Your father will look sad, but Christ will rejoice; your family will grieve, but the angels will give you their congratulations.  Your father may do what he likes with his own estates; you are not his to whom you have been born, but His to whom you have been born again, and who has ransomed you at a great price, even with His own blood. 

[5. Jerome warns her against servants who might encourage her to remarry for their own gain, those who attack Christians, backed by monks who oppose Jerome.

[6. He recognizes her desire to remain unmarried, advises her to think of her holy mother (sanctam matrem) rather than the desires of her father who loves her but wants the wrong thing for her.  Jerome encourages her to seize the opportunity God sent her with the death of her husband. 

[7. He tells her to avoid adornment.  “Either we must speak as we dress, or dress as we speak.  Why do we profess one thing and display another?  The tongue talks of chastity, but the whole body reveals incontinence.”  

[8. He tells her to avoid pleasures like rich food and wine.  “Why then must we make a boast of chastity, which cannot be regarded as genuine unless it is supported by its two handmaids and assistants, continence and frugality?”] 

9.  In saying this I do not condemn food ‘which God created to be enjoyed with thanksgiving,’ but I assert that for young men and girls some food is an incentive to sensuality.  Neither Etna’s fire, nor Vulcan’s isle, nor Vesuvius and Olympus, seethe with such burning heat as does the youthful marrow when it is flushed with wine and inflamed by feasting.  Many men trample avarice underfoot and lay it down as easily as their purses.  An enforced silence serves as corrective to a slanderous tongue  One single hour can change a man's fashion of dress and outward appearance. All other sins are outside ourselves, and what is external can easily be cast away. Carnal desire alone, implanted in men by God for the procreation of children, if it oversteps its due limits, becomes a sin, and by a law of nature burns to force its way to carnal intercourse. It is a task for pre-eminent virtue and the most watchful care, seeing that you were born in the flesh, not to live the life of the flesh. You must fight against yourself every day and keep guard against the enemy within you with the hundred eyes of the fabled Argus. This is what the apostle said in other words: ' Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.' Physicians and those who have written on the nature of the human frame, especially Galen in his treatise On Health, say that the bodies of young men and of full-grown men and women glow with an innate warmth, and that for persons of these ages all food is harmful which tends to increase that heat, while it is conducive to health for them to eat and drink anything that is cold. On the other hand they say that for old people who suffer from humours and from chilliness, warm food and old wine are beneficial. Hence the Saviour says: 'Take heed to yourselves lest at any time your hearts be overcharged with surfeiting and drunkenness, and cares of this life.'  So too the apostle: 'Be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess.' No wonder that the potter felt thus about the frail vessel which He had made, seeing that even the comic dramatist, whose aim is to know and to describe the ways of men says: ‘Venus grows cold if Ceres be not there And Bacchus with her’ [Terence, Eunuchus, 732].  

10. In the first place then, if your stomach is strong enough, until you pass out of girlhood drink only water, by nature the coolest of all beverages. If your health renders this impossible, listen to the advice given to Timothy : ' Use a little wine for thy stomach's sake and thine often infirmities.'  Secondly, in the way of food avoid all heating dishes. I do not speak of meat only—although on it the chosen vessel delivers this judgment: ' It is good neither to eat flesh nor to drink wine ' —but with vegetables also anything that creates wind or lies heavy on the stomach should be rejected. You should know that nothing is so good for young Christians as a diet of herbs. So in another place Paul says : ' Let him who is weak eat herbs.'  By cold food the heat of the body should be tempered. Though Daniel and the three children lived on vegetables, they were only children and had not reached that frying pan in which the king of Babylon cooked the elders who were judges. We do not seek for the physical strength which by a special privilege of God's grace they gained from this diet; we aim rather at vigour of soul, which becomes stronger as the flesh grows weaker. This is the reason why some of those who aspire to a life of chastity fall midway on the road. They think that they need merely abstain from meat, and they load their stomach with vegetables which are only harmless when taken sparingly and in moderation. To give you my real opinion, I think that nothing so inflames the body and titillates the organs of generation as undigested food, and convulsive belching. With you, my daughter, I would rather risk offending your modesty than understate my case. Regard as poison anything that has within it the seeds of sensual pleasure. A frugal diet which leaves you always hungry is to be preferred to a three days' fast, and it is much better to go short every day than occasionally to satisfy your appetite to the full. That rain is best which falls slowly to earth : a sudden and excessive shower which comes tumbling down washes away the soil. 

11.When you are eating, remember that immediately afterwards you will have to pray and read. Take a fixed number of lines from the Holy Scripture and show them up as your task* to your Lord; and do not lie down to rest until you have filled your heart's basket with this precious yarn. After the Holy Scriptures, read the treatises that have been written by learned men, provided, of course, that they are persons of known faith. You need not seek for gold amid the mire: with many pearls buy the one pearl of price. As Jeremiah says, stand in more ways than one, so that you may come to the way that leads to the Father. Change your love of necklaces and jewels and silk dresses to a desire for scriptural knowledge. Enter the land of promise that flows with milk and honey. Eat wheaten flour and oil, dress like Joseph in coats of many colours, let your ears, like Jerusalem's, be pierced by the word of God, so that the precious grains of new corn may hang from them. You have in the saintly Exuperius** a man of tried years and faith, who can give you constant support with his advice. 

 [12. Jerome advises her to give to the poor, those in need. 

[13. He tells her to avoid the company of young people who wear fancy dress, play and sing, but seek the company of holy virgins and widows.]     Oh, if you could see your sister [Eustochium], and be allowed to listen to the eloquence of her holy lips, and behold the mighty spirit that dwells within her small body!  Oh, if you could hear the whole contents of the Old and New Testament come bubbling from her heart!  Fasting is her sport, prayer her favorite pastime.  Like Miriam, after the drowning of Pharaoh, she takes up her timbrel and leads the virgin choir:  ‘Let us sing to the Lord, for He hath triumphed gloriously; the horse and his rider He hath thrown into the sea.’  She teaches her companions to be music-girls for Christ, and trains them as lute-players for the Saviour. Thus she passes her days and nights, and with oil ready in her lamp awaits the coming of the Bridegroom. Take pattern then by your kinswoman. Let Rome have what Bethlehem, a smaller place than Rome, already possesses. 

14.You have money, and can easily supply food to those who want it. Let virtue take what was meant for extravagance : no woman who means to scorn marriage need fear poverty. Ransom  virgins and lead them into the Saviour's chamber. Support widows and mingle them like violets with the virgins' lilies and the martyrs' roses. These are the garlands you must make for Christ in place of the crown of thorns in which He bore the sins of the world. Let your noble father rejoice to help you; let him learn from his daughter as he once learned from his wife. His hair is grey, his knees shake, his teeth are falling out, his forehead is disfigured by wrinkles, death stands near at his door, and the pyre is being marked out for him close by. Whether we like it or not, we are old men now. Let him provide for himself the provision he needs for his long journey. Let him take with him that which otherwise he must reluctantly leave behind; nay, let him send before him to heaven what, if he does not take care, will be appropriated by earth. 

 [15. Jerome says young widows remarry for the wrong reasons, financial support or protection of themselves and their children, or lust.  He warns against the potential dangers from a jealous step-father, or the difficulties of being cast as a step-mother.  “A mother sets over her children not a stepfather but an enemy, not a parent but a tyrant.  Inflamed by lustfulness she forgets her own offspring, and in the midst of the little ones who know nothing of their sad fate the lately weeping widow arrays herself afresh as a bride. … If you are not spurred on by lust, surely it is the height of madness to prostitute yourself like a  harlot merely to increase your wealth, and for a paltry and passing gain to pollute that precious chastity which might endure for ever.  If you have children, why do you want to marry?  If you have none, why do you not fear the barrenness you have already known?”  He warns of the problems that might arise between the children of the two marriages.] 

16. Do we wish to know how widows ought to behave ? Let us read the Gospel according to Luke: 'There was one Anna,' he says,' a prophetess, the daughter of Phanuel of the tribe of Aser.' Anna means 'grace,' Phanuel in our language is the 'face of God,' Aser is translated either as 'blessedness' or 'wealth.' As then she had borne the burden of widowhood from her youth up to the age of fourscore and four years, and never left the temple day or night, giving herself to fasting and prayer, therefore she earned spiritual grace and is called daughter of the face of God, and in blessedness and wealth is reckoned with her ancestors. Let us remember the widow of Zarephath, who considered the satisfaction of Elijah's hunger more important than her own and her children's lives. Though she thought that she and her son that very night would die, she meant her guest to survive, preferring to lose life rather than her name for charity. In her handful of meal she found the seed of the Lord's harvest. She sows her meal and, lo! a cruse of oil appears. In Judaea there was a scarcity of corn, for the grain of wheat had died; but in the house of a heathen widow streams of oil gushed forth. We read in the book of Judith, if we may accept that record, of a widow spent with fasting and unkempt in mourner's dress, who was not so much grieving for her dead husband but in squalor awaiting the advent of the Bridegroom. I see her hand armed with a sword and stained with blood, I recognize the head of Holofernes carried in triumph from the midst of the enemy. A woman conquers men, chastity beheads lust, and then suddenly changing her dress she returns again to her victorious squalor, a squalor finer than all the pomp of this world. 

17. Some people ignorantly count Deborah among the widows, and think that Barak, the leader of the army, was her son. The Scripture gives a different account. I will mention her now because she was a prophetess and is reckoned as one of the judges, and also because she could say: ' How sweet are thy words unto my taste! Yea, sweeter than honey to my mouth.' Rightly was she called ' the bee,' for she fed on the flowers of the Scriptures, she was steeped in the fragrance of the Holy Spirit, and with prophetic lips she gathered the sweet juices of the nectar. Naomi, in our language parakeklemene, 'she who is consoled,' when her husband and children died in a foreign land, carried her chastity back to her native country, and supported by that provision for her journey, kept with her the Moabite woman who was her son's wife [Ruth], that in her the prophecy of Isaiah might be fulfilled: 'Send out the lamb, O Lord, to rule over the land from the rock of the desert.' I come now to the widow in the Gospel, that poor humble widow who was richer than all the people of Israel. She had but a grain of mustard seed, but she put her leaven into three measures of flour, and tempering her confession of the Father and Son with the grace of the Holy Spirit, she cast her two mites into the treasury. All her substance and her entire wealth she offered in the double testament of her faith. These are the two seraphim which glorify the Trinity with triple song, and are stored among the treasures of the Church. Hence, also, the double pincers wherewith the live coal is gripped to purge the sinner's lips. 

18.But why should I go back to ancient times and quote instances of female virtue from books? Before your own eyes in Rome, where you are living now, you have many women whom you might well choose for your model. I will not take them individually lest I should seem to flatter: you may be content with one, the saintly Marcella, who while she maintains the glory of her family has given us an example of the Gospel life. Anna lived with a husband seven years from her virginity; Marcella lived seven months. Anna looked for the coming of Christ; Marcella holds fast to the Lord whom Anna welcomed. Anna sang of Him, when He was still a puling infant ; Marcella proclaims His triumph. Anna spoke of Him to all those who were awaiting the redemption of Jerusalem; Marcella cries aloud with the nations of the redeemed: ' A brother redeemeth not, yet a man shall redeem,'  and from another psalm: ' A man was born in her and the Highest Himself hath established her.'  About two years ago I know that I published a treatise against Jovinian, in which I refuted by the authority of the Scriptures the objections based on the apostle’s concession of second marriages.  It is unnecessary to repeat my arguments afresh, for you can borrow them from that book.  That I may not exceed the limits of a letter, I will give you this final piece of advice.  Think every day that you must die, and then you wll never thnk of a second marriage. 

 

Original letter:

AD FURIAM DE UIDUITATE SERUANDA 1. Obsecras litteris et suppliciter deprecaris, ut tibi rescribam, immo scribam, quomodo uiuere debeas et uiduitatis coronam inlaeso pudicitiae nomine conseruare. gaudet animus, exultant uiscera, gestit affectus hoc te cupere esse post uirum, quod sanctae memoriae mater tua Titiana multo fuit tempore sub marito. exauditae sunt preces et orationes eius. inpetrauit in unica filia, quod uiuens ipsa possederat. habes praeterea generis tui grande priuilegium, quod exinde a Camillo uel nulla uel rara uestrae familiae scribitur secundos nosse concubitus, ut non tam laudanda sis, si uidua perseueres, quam execranda, si id Christiana non serues, quod per tanta saecula gentiles feminae custodierunt.
2.Taceo de Paula et Eustochio, stirpis uestrae floribus, ne per occasionem exhortationis tuae illas laudare uidear, Blesillamque praetereo, quae maritum suum, tuum secuta germanum in breui uitae spatio tempora uirtutum multa conpleuit atque utinam praeconia feminarum imitarentur uiri et rugosa senectus redderet, quod sponte offert adulescentia! sciens et uidens in flammam mitto manum: adducentur supercilia, extendetur brachium iratusque Chremes tumido desaeuiet ore. consurgent proceres et aduersum epistulam meam turba patricia detonabit me magum, me seductorem clamitans et in terras ultimas asportandum. addant, si uolunt, et Samariten, ut domini mei titulum recognoscam. certe filiam a parente non diuido nec dico illud de euangelio: sine mortui sepeliant mortuos suos. uiuit enim, qui credit in Christo, et, qui in illum credit, debet utique, quomodo ille ambulauit, et ipse ambulare.
3. Facessat inuidia, quam nomini Christiano maledicorum semper genuinus infigit, ut, dum probra metuunt, ad uirtutes non prouocent exceptis epistulis ignoramus alterutrum, solaque causa pietatis est, ubi carnis nulla notitia est. honora patrem tuum, sed, si te a uero patre non separat. tam diu scito sanguinis copulam, quam diu ille suum nouerit creatorem; alioquin Dauid tibi protinus canet: audi, filia, et uide et inclina aurem tuam et obliuiscere populum tuum et domum patris tui; et concupiscet rex decorem tuum, quia ipse est dominus deus tuus. grande praemium parentis obliti: concupiscet rex decorem tuum. quia audisti, quia uidisti, quia inclinasti aurem tuam et populi tui domusque patris oblita es, idcirco concupiscet rex decorem tuum et dicet tibi: tota pulchra es, proxima mea, et macula non est in te. quid pulchrius anima, quae dei filia nuncupatur et nullos extrinsecus quaerit ornatus? credit in Christum et hac ambitione ditata pergit ad sponsum eundem habens dominum, quem et uirum.
4. Quid angustiarum habeant nuptiae, didicisti in ipsis nuptiis et quasi coturnicum carnibus usque ad nausiam saturata es. amarissimam choleram tuae sensere fauces, egessisti acescentes et morbidos cibos, releuasti aestuantem stomachum: quid uis rursus ingerere, quod tibi noxium fuit? canis reuertens ad uomitum et sus ad uolutabrum luti. bruta quoque animalia et uagae aues in easdem pedicas retiaque non incidunt. an uereris, ne proles Furiana deficiat et ex te parens tuus non habeat pusionem, qui reptet in pectore et ceruices eius stercore linat? quippini? omnes habent filios, quae habuere matrimonia, et, quibus nati sunt liberi, suo generi responderunt! exhibuit Ciceronis filius patrem in eloquentia? Cornelia uestra, pudicitiae simul et fecunditatis exemplar, Graecos suos se genuisse laetata est? ridiculum sperare pro certo, quod multos et non habere uideas et, cum habuerint, perdidisse. cui dimittis tantas diuitias? Christo, qui mori non potest, quem habebis heredem? ipsum, quem et dominum. contristabitur pater, sed laetabitur Christus; lugebit familia, sed angeli gratulabuntur. faciat pater, quod uult, de substantia sua: non es eius, cui nata es, sed cui renata et qui te grandi pretio redemit, sanguine suo.
5. Caue nutrices et gerulas et istius modi uinosa animalia, quae de corio tuo saturare uentrem suum cupiunt. non suadent, quod tibi, sed, quod sibi prosit, et saepe illud obganniunt: solane perpetua maerens carpere iuuenta nec dulces natos Ueneris nec praemia noris? ubi pudicitia et sanctitas, ibi frugalitas est; ubi frugalitas, ibi damna seruorum. quidquid non tulerint, sibi ablatum putant nec considerant, de quanto, sed quantum accipiant. ubicumque uiderint Christianum, statim illud e triuio: ho Graikos, ho epithetes [Greek letters] hi rumores turpissimos serunt et, quod ab ipsis egressum est, ab aliis audisse se simulant, idem auctores et exaggeratores. exin fama de mendacio, quae, cum ad matronas peruenerit et earum linguis fuerit uentilata, prouincias penetrat. uideas plerasque rabido ore saeuire et tincta facie, uiperinis orbibus, dentibus pumicatis carpere Christianos, hic aliqua, cui circa humeros hyacinthina laena est, rancidulum quiddam balba de nare locuta perstrepit ac tenero supplantat uerba palato. omnis consonat chorus et latrant uniuersa subsellia. iunguntur nostri ordinis, qui et roduntur et rodunt aduersum nos loquaces, pro se muti; quasi et ipsi aliud sint quam monachi et non, quidquid in monachos dicitur, redundet in clericos, qui patres sunt monachorum. detrimentum pecoris pastoris ignominia est, sicut e regione illius monachi uita laudatur, qui uenerationi habet sacerdotes Christi et non detrahit gradui, per quem factus est Christianus.
6. Haec locutus sum, in Christo filia, non dubitans de proposito tuo — numquam enim exhortatorias litteras postulares, si ambigeres de bono monogamiae —, sed ut nequitiam seruulorum, qui te uenalem portant, et insidias adfinium ac pium parentis errorem intellegeres, cui, ut amorem in te tribuam, amoris scientiam non concedo dicens aliquid cum apostolo: confiteor, zelum dei habent, sed non secundum scientiam. imitare potius — crebro enim id ipsum repetam— sanctam matrem tuam, cuius ego quotiens recordor, uenit in mentem ardor eius in Christum, pallor ex ieiuniis, elemosyna in pauperes, obsequium in seruos dei, humilitas et cordis et uestium atque in cunctis sermo moderatus. pater tuus, quem ego honoris causa nomino — non quia consularis et patricius, sed quia Christianus est —, inpleat nomen suum et laetetur filiam Christo se genuisse, non saeculo; quin potius doleat, quod et uirginitatem frustra amiseris et fructus perdideris nuptiarum. ubi est maritus, quem tibi dedit? etiamsi amabilis, etiamsi bonus fuisset, mors finisset omnia et copulam carnis soluisset interitus. arripe, quaeso, occasionem et fac de necessitate uirtutem. non quaeruntur in Christianis initia, sed finis: Paulus male coepit, sed bene finiuit; Iudae laudantur exordia, sed finis proditione damnatur. lege Ezechiel: iustitia iusti non liberabit eum, in quacumque die peccauerit, et inpietas inpii non nocebit ei, in quacumque die conuersus fuerit ab inpietate sua. ista est scala Iacob, per quam angeli conscendunt atque descendunt, cui dominus innititur lassis porrigens manum et fessos ascendentium gressus sui contemplatione sustentans. sed, sicut non uult mortem peccatoris, tantum ut reuertatur et uiuat, ita tepidos odit et cito ei nausiam faciunt. cui plus dimittitur, plus diligit.
7. Meretrix illa in euangelio baptizata lacrimis suis et crine, quo multos ante deceperat, pedes domini tergente seruata est. non habuit crispantes mitras nec stridentes calceolos nec orbes stibio fuliginatos, quanto foedior, tanto pulchrior. quid facit in facie Christianae purpurissus et cerussa? quorum alterum ruborem genarum labiorumque mentitur, alterum candorem oris et colli: ignes iuuenum, fomenta libidinum, inpudicae mentis indicia, quomodo flere potest pro peccatis suis, quae lacrimis cutem nudat et sulcos ducit in facie? ornatus iste non domini est, uelamen istud antichristi est. qua fiducia erigit ad caelum uultus, quos conditor non agnoscat? frustra obtenditur adulescentia et aetas puellaris adseritur; uidua, quae marito placere desiuit et iuxta apostolum uere uidua est, nihil habet necessarium nisi perseuerantiam. meminit pristinae uoluptatis, scit, quid amiserit, quo delectata sit: ardentes diaboli sagittae ieiuniorum et uigiliarum frigore restinguendae sunt aut loquendum nobis est, ut uestiti sumus, aut uestiendum, ut loquimur. quid aliud pollicemur et aliud ostendimus? lingua personat castitatem et totum corpus praefert inpudicitiam.
8. Hoc quantum ad habitum pertinet et ornatum. ceterum uidua, quae in deliciis est, — non est meum, sed apostoli — uiuens mortua est. quid sibi uult hoc, quod ait: uiuens mortua est? uiuere quidem uidetur ignorantibus et non esse peccato mortua, sed Christo, quem secreta non fallunt, mortua est. anima enim, quae peccauerit, ipsa morietur. quorundam hominum peccata manifesta sunt praecedentia ad iudicium, quosdam autem et subsequuntur. similiter et facta bona manifesta sunt et, quae aliter se habent, abscondi non possunt. quod dicit, istius modi est: quidam tam libere et palam peccant, ut, postquam eos uideris, statim intellegas peccatores; alios autem, qui callide occultant uitia sua, ex sequenti conuersatione cognoscimus. similiter et bona apud alios in propatulo sunt, in aliis longo usu discimus. quid ergo necesse est nos iactare pudicitiam, quae sine comitibus et adpendiculis suis, continentia et parcitate, fidem sui facere non potest? apostolus macerat corpus suum et animae subicit imperio, ne, quod aliis praecipit, ipse non seruet: et adulescentula fervente cibis corpore de castitate secura est?
9. Neque uero haec dicens condemno cibos, quos deus creauit ad utendum cum gratiarum actione, sed iuuenibus et puellis incentiua esse adsero uoluptatum. non Aetnaei ignes, non Uulcania tellus, non Ueseuus et Olympus tantis ardoribus aestnant, ut iuueniles medullae uino plenae, dapibus inflammatae. auaritia calcatur a plerisque et cum marsuppio deponitur; maledicam linguam indictum emendat silentium; cultus corporis et habitus uestium unius horae spatio commutatur; omnia alia peccata extrinsecus sunt et, quod a foris est, facile abicitur: sola libido insita a deo ob liberorum creationem, si fines suos egressa fuerit, redundat in uitium et quadam lege naturae in coitum gestit erumpere. grandis ergo uirtutis est et sollicitae diligentiae superare, quod natus sis in carne, non carnaliter uiuere, tecum pugnare cottidie et inclusum hostem Argi, ut fabulae ferunt, centum oculis obseruare. hoc est, quod apostolus uerbis aliis loquebatur: omne peccatum, quod fecerit homo, extra corpus est; qui autem fornicatur, in corpus suum peccat. aiunt medici et qui de humanorum corporum scripsere naturis praecipueque Galenus in libris, quorum titulus est peri hugieinon [in Greek], puerorum et iuuenum ac perfectae aetatis uirorum mulierumque corpora insito calore feruere et noxios esse his aetatibus cibos, qui calorem augeant, sanitatique conducere frigida quaeque in esu et potu sumere, sicut e contrario senibus, qui pituita laborent et frigore, calidos cibos et uetera uina prode esse, unde et saluator: adtendite, inquit, uobis, ne forte adgrauentur corda uestra in crapula et ebrietate et curis huius uitae. et apostolus: uino, in quo est luxuria. nec mirum hoc figulum sensisse de uasculo, quod ipse fabricatus est, cum etiam comicus, cuius finis est humanos mores nosse atque describere, dixerit: sine Cerere et Libero friget Uenus.
10. Primum igitur, si tamen stomachi firmitas patitur, donec puellares annos transeas, aquam in potum sume, quae natura frigidissima est, aut, si hoc inbecillitas prohibet, audi cum Timotheo: uino modico utere propter stomachum et frequentes tuas infirmitates. deinde in ipsis cibis calida quaeque deuita; non solum de carnibus loquor, super quibus uas electionis profert sententiam: bonum est uinum non bibere et carnem non manducare, sed etiam in ipsis leguminibus inflantia quaeque et grauia declinanda sunt — nihilque ita scias conducere Christianis adulescentibus ut esum holerum, unde et in alio loco: qui in firmus est, ait, holera manducet — ardorque corporum frigidioribus epulis temperandus est. si autem tres pueri et Daniel leguminibus nescebantur, pueri erant necdum ad sartaginem uenerant, in qua rex Babylonius senes iudices frixit. nobis non corporum cultus, qui in illis — excepto priuilegio gratiae dei — ex huiusce modi cibis enituerat, sed animae uigor quaeritur, quae carnis infirmitate fit fortior. inde est, quod nonnulli uitam pudicam adpetentium in medio itinere corruunt, dum solam abstinentiam carnium putant et leguminibus onerant stomachum, quae moderate parceque sumpta innoxia sunt, et ut, quod sentio, loquar, nihil sic inflammat corpora et titillat membra genitalia nisi indigestus cibus ructusque conuulsus. malo apud te, filia, uerecundia parumper quam causa periclitari, quidquid seminarium uoluptatum est, uenenum puta. parcus cibus et semper uenter esuriens triduanis ieiuniis praeferatur et multo melius est cottidie parum quam raro satis sumere. pluuia illa optima est, quae sensim descendit in terras; subitus et nimius imber praeceps arua subuertit.
11. Quando comedis, cogita, quod statim tibi orandum, ilico legendum sit. de scripturis sanctis habeto fixum uersuum numerum; istud pensum domino tuo redde nec ante quieti membra concedas, quam calathum pectoris tui hoc subtegmine inpleueris. post scripturas sanctas doctorum hominum tractatus lege, eorum dumtaxat, quorum fides nota est. non necesse habes aurum in luto quaerere: multis margaritis unam redime margaritam. sta iuxta Hieremiam in uiis pluribus, ut ad illam uiam, quae ad patrem ducit, peruenias. amorem monilium atque gemmarum sericarumque uestium transfer ad scientiam scripturarum. ingredere terram repromissionis lacte et melle manantem, comede similam et oleum, uestire cum Ioseph uariis indumentis, perforentur aures tuae cum Hierusalem sermone dei, ut pretiosa ex illis nouarum segetum grana dependeant. habes sanctum Exsuperium probatae aetatis et fidei, qui te monitis suis frequenter instituat.
12. Fac tibi amicos de iniquo mammona, qui te recipiant in aeterna tabernacula. illis tribue diuitias tuas, qui non Phasides aues, sed cibarium panem coemant, qui famem expellant, non qui augeant luxuriam. intellege super egenum et pauperem. omni petenti te da, sed maxime domesticis fidei: nudum uesti, esurientem ciba, aegrotantem uisita. quotiens cumque manum extendis, Christum cogita. caue, ne mendicante domino tuo alienas diuitias augeas.
13. Iuuenum fuge consortia, comatulos, comptos atque lasciuos domus tuae tecta non uideant. cantor pellatur ut noxius; fidicinas et psaltrias et istius modi chorum diaboli quasi mortifera sirenarum carmina proturba ex aedibus tuis. noli ad publicum subinde procedere et spadonum exercitu praeeunte uiduarum circumferri libertate. pessimae consuetudinis est, cum fragilis sexus et inbecilla aetas suo arbitrio abutitur et putat licere, quod libet. omnia quidem licent, sed non omnia expediunt. nec procurator calamistratus nec formosus conlactaneus nec candidulus et rubicundus adsecula adhaereant lateri tuo: interdum animus dominarum ex ancillarum habitu iudicatur. sanctarum uirginum et uiduarum societatem adpete et, si sermocinandi cum uiris incumbit necessitas, arbitros ne deuites tantaque confabulandi fiducia sit, ut intrante alio nec paueas nec erubescas. speculum mentis est facies et taciti oculi cordis fatentur arcana, uidimus nuper ignominiosum per totum orientem uolitasse: et aetas et cultus et habitus et incessus, indiscreta societas, exquisitae epulae, regius apparatus Neronis et Sardanapalli nuptias loquebantur. aliorum uulnus nostra sit cautio; pestilente flagellato stultus sapientior erit. sanctus amor inpatientiam non habet; falsus rumor cito opprimitur et uita posterior iudicat de priori, fieri quidem non potest, ut absque morsu hominum uitae huius curricula quis pertranseat, malorumque solacium est bonos carpere, dum peccantium multitudine putant culpam minui peccatorum; sed tamen cito ignis stipulae conquiescit et exundans flamma deficientibus nutrimentis paulatim emoritur. si anno praeterito fama mentita est aut, si certe uerum dixit, cesset uitium, cessabit et rumor. haec dico, non quo de te sinistrum quid metuam, sed quo pietatis affectu etiam, quae tuta sunt, pertimescam, o si uideres sororem tuam et illud sacri oris eloquium coram audire contingeret, cerneres in paruo corpusculo ingentes animos, audires totam ueteris et noui testamenti supellectilem ex illius corde feruere. ieiunia pro ludo habet, orationem pro deliciis. tenet tympanum in exemplum Mariae et Pharaone submerso uirginum choro praecinit: cantemus domino; gloriose enim magnificatus est, equum et ascensorem deiecit in mare, has docet psaltrias Christo, has fidicinas erudit saluatori. sic dies, sic nox ducitur et oleo ad lampadas praeparato sponsi expectatur aduentus. imitare ergo et tu consanguineam tuam: habeat Roma, quod angustior urbe Romana possidet Bethleem.
14. Habes opes, facile tibi est indigentibus uictus subsidia ministrare. quod luxuriae parabatur, uirtus insumat; nulla nuptias contemptura timeat egestatem. redime uirgines, quas in cubicultim saluatoris inducas, suscipe uiduas, quas inter uirginum lilia et martyrum rosas quasi quasdam uiolas misceas; pro corona spinea, in qua mundi Christus delicta portauit, talia serta conpone. laetetur et adiuuet uir nobilissimus, pater tuus; discat a filia, quod didicerat ab uxore. iam incanuit caput, tremunt genua, dentes cadunt et frontem obscenam rugis arat, uicina est mors in foribus, designatur rogus prope: uelimus nolimus, senes sumus. paret sibi uiaticum, quod longo itinere necessarium est. secum portet, quod inuitus dimissurus est, immo praemittat in caelum, quod, ni cauerit, terra sumptura est.
15. Solent adulescentulae uiduae, quarum nonnullae abierunt retro satanan, cum luxuriatae fuerint in Christo, subantes dicere: ‘patrimoniolum meum cottidie perit, maiorum hereditas dissipatur, seruus contumeliose locutus est, imperium ancilla neglexit. quis procedet ad publicum? quis respondebit pro agrorum tributis? paruulos meos quis erudiet? uernulas quis educabit?’ et hanc — pro nefas! — causam opponunt matrimonii, quae uel sola debuit nuptias inpedire. superducit mater filiis non uitricum, sed hostem, non parentem, sed tyrannum. inflammata libidine obliuiscitur uteri sui et inter paruulos suas miserias nescientes lugens dudum noua nupta conponitur. quid obtendis patrimonium, quid superbiam seruulorum? confitere turpitudinem. nulla idcirco ducit maritum, ut cum marito non dormiat. aut si certe libido non stimulat, quae tanta insania est in morem scortorum prostituere castitatem, ut augeantur diuitiae et propter rem uilem atque perituram pudicitia, quae et pretiosa et aeterna est, polluatur? si habes liberos, nuptias quid requiris? si non habes, quare expertam non metuis sterilitatem et rem incertam certo praefers pudori? scribuntur tibi nunc sponsales tabulae, ut post paululum testamentum facere conpellaris. simulabitur mariti infirmitas et, quod te morituram facere uolet, ipse uicturus faciet. aut si euenerit, ut et de secundo marito habeas filios, domestica pugna, intestinum proelium. non licebit tibi amare liberos nec aequis aspicere oculis, quos genuisti. clam porriges cibos, inuidebit mortuo et, nisi oderis filios, adhuc eorum amare uideberis patrem. quodsi de priori uxore habens sobolem te domum introduxerit, etiamsi clementissima fueris, omnes comoediae et mimographi et communes rhetorum loci in nouercam saeuissimam declamabunt. si priuignus languerit et condoluerit caput, infamaberis ut uenefica. si non dederis cibos, crudelis, si dederis, malefica diceris. oro te, quid habent tantum boni secundae nuptiae, ut haec mala ualeant conpensare?
16. Uolumus scire, quales esse debeant uiduae? legamus euangelium secundum Lucam: et erat, inquit, Anna prophetissa, filia Phanuel de tribu Aser. Anna interpretatur ‘gratia’, Phanuel in lingua nostra resonat ‘uultum dei’, Aser uel in ‘beatitudinem’ uel in ‘diuitias’ uertitur. quia ergo ab adulescentia usque ad octoginta quattuor annos uiduitatis onus sustinuerat et non recedebat de templo dei diebus ac noctibus insistens ieiuniis et obsecrationibus, idcirco meruit gratiam spiritalem et nuncupatur filia uultus dei et atauis beatitudine diuitiisque censetur. recordemur uiduae Sareptenae, quae et suae et filiorum saluti Heliae praetulit famem et ipsa nocte moritura cum filio superstitem hospitem relinquebat malens uitam perdere quam elemosynam et in pugillo farris seminarium sibi messis dominicae praeparauit. farina seritur et olei capsaces nascitur. in Iudaea frumenti penuria — granum enim tritici ibi mortuum fuerat — et in gentium uiduae olei fluenta manabant. legimus Iudith — si cui tamen placet uolumen recipere — uiduam confectam ieiuniis et habitu lugubri sordidatam, quae non lugebat mortuum uirum, sed squalore corporis sponsi quaerebat aduentum. uideo armatam gladio manum, cruentam dexteram, recognoaco caput Holofernae de mediis hostibus reportatum. uincit uiros femina et castitas truncat libidinem habituque repente mutato ad uictrices sordes redit omnibus saeculi cultibus mundiores.
17. Quidam inperite et Debboram inter uiduas numerant ducemque Barac arbitrantur Debborae filium, cum aliud scriptura commemoret. nobis ad hoc nominabitur, quod prophetissa fuerit et in ordine iudicum supputetur. et quia dicere poterat: quam dulcia gutturi meo eloquia tua, super mel et fauum ori meo, apis nomen accepit scripturarum floribus pasta, spiritus sancti odore perfusa et dulces ambrosiae sucos prophetali ore conponens. Neomin, quae nobiscum sonat parakeklimene [Greek letters] quam interpretari possumus ’consolatam’, marito et liberis peregre mortuis pudicitiam reportauit in patriam et hoc sustentata uiatico nurum Moabitidem tenuit, ut illud Esaiae uaticinium conpleretur: emitte agnum, domine, dominatorem terrae, de petra deserti. uenio ad uiduam de euangelio, uiduam pauperculam, omni Israhelitico populo ditiorem, quae accipiens granum sinapis et mittens fermentum in farinae satis tribus patris et filii confessionem spiritus sancti gratia temperauit et duo minuta misit in gazophylacium quidquid habere poterat in substantia sua uniuersasque diuitias in utroque fidei suae obtulit testamento. haec sunt duo seraphin ter glorificantia trinitatem et in thesauro ecclesiae condita, unde et forcipe utriusque instrumenti ardens carbo conprehensus purgat labia peccatoris.
18. Quid uetera repetam et virtutes feminarum de libris proferam, cum possis multas tibi ante oculos proponere in urbe, qua uiuis, quarum imitari exemplum debeas? et ne uidear adulatione per singulas currere, sufficit tibi sancta Marcella, quae respondens generi suo aliquid nobis de euangelio retulit. Anna septem annis a uirginitate sua uixerat cum marito, ista septem mensibus; illa Christi expectabat aduentum, ista tenet, quem illa susceperat; illa uagientem canebat, ista praedicat triumphantem; illa loquebatur de eo omnibus, qui expectabant redemptionem Hierusalem, haec cum redemptis gentibus clamitat: frater non redimit, redimet homo? et de alio psalmo: homo natus est in ea et ipse fundauit eam altissimus. scio me ante hoc ferme biennium edidisse libros contra Iouinianum, quibus uenientes e contrario quaestiones, ubi apostolus concedit secunda matrimonia, scripturarum auctoritate contriui. et non necesse est eadem ex integro scribere, cum possis inde, quae scripta sunt, mutuari. hoc tantum, ne modum egrediar epistulae, admonitam uolo: cogita te cottidie esse morituram, et numquam de secundis nuptiis cogitabis.

Historical context:

After she was widowed, Furia wrote to Jerome asking him to give her a guide for a chaste life as a widow. He takes the occasion to disparage the married state vehemently, to discourage her from ever thinking of it again despite pressure from her family, and then outlines a life of devotion and denial and good works. He includes examples of strong and virtuous women from the bible and one from contemporary life, Marcella. I have summarized some passages, which are given in brackets.

Scholarly notes:

• * Pensum, the weight of wool allotted to a servant to be made into yarn; the day’s task.
  ** Exuperius, bishop of Toulouse and a friend of Jerome.

Printed source:

Sancti Eusebii Hieronymi Epistulae, ed. Isidorus Hilberg, 3 v. (New York: Johnson, 1970, CSEL, repr.1910-18), 1.466-85, ep.54.   Translation from F.A. Wright, Select Letters of St. Jerome, Loeb Classical Library (Cambridge:  Harvard, repr. 1980), 228-64.

Date:

394